Transgender Dating Guide
FAQ For T-Girl Admirers
T-girls
are special - Femininity
is a tremendous satisfaction for t-girls and most love the attention from a
gentleman admirer. Notice the word "gentleman." When a t-girl feels
that she is being treated with the dignity and respect befitting a lady she is
in heaven. Make a t-girl feel like a lady and you're well on your way to
success! Some of the men I have spoken with tell me that nobody else can make
them feel the way a t-girl can make them feel. I think it would be a safe guess
that these guys know how to treat a t-girl like a lady. T-girls really are
special and they can make you feel special too!
Identify what
you're looking for - Do you want a long-term relationship, short-term
relationship or a sexual encounter. In other words, how serious are you. Do you
want to meet a pre-op, post-op, transvestite, etc. Perhaps you're interested in
a sexual experience but you're open to the idea that it could lead to a
long-term relationship.
Understand that
not all t-girls are the same - It is important that you have at least a
basic understanding of the various types of t-girls. A common mistake is to
assume that all t-girls are the same. This is risky business and your
misunderstanding could cause you to miss out on an opportunity to meet the t-girl
of your dreams. Some t-girls are heterosexual male crossdressers. They simply
aren't interested in men, so perhaps you shouldn't waste your time. Others are
bi-sexual (your chances are improving here). Some t-girls are looking for men,
others are looking for women. Some are seeking sex changes, and others are not.
Some live full-time as females, others live part-time as females. Confused yet?
You really shouldn't be. T-girls fall somewhere within a broad spectrum. Read or
listen as t-girls describe themselves and you will gain insight into exactly
where they are in their life and where they intend to go. A dialog should be
able to resolve any remaining questions you might have. Remember that
you're looking for someone who will compliment what you're looking for and your
job is to narrow the field to those who are looking for someone just like you!
What kind of T-girl
do you want to meet? - One of the most awkward topics is also one of the
most important. You already know that not all t-girls are the same. The fact is
that many are actively pursuing sex change surgery and are uncomfortable with
their male genitalia. These t-girls are not likely to take kindly to your desire
to fondle their "extra parts." Others are quite comfortable and are
willing to explore all aspects of their sexuality. Simple communication will
answer that question and you can decide what is important to you. I would
recommend that you pose a question whenever it is appropriate, such as, how
would you expect your partner to satisfy you? Notice that this question seeks to
draw out a response and you may be surprised at what you can learn about a
person by asking these types of questions. Obviously this wouldn't be the first
question you would want to ask, but at the right time, a probing question can
provide you with a wealth of information and insight.
Use proper
terminology - You will quickly learn that not all t-girls like being called
shemales. While some of us don't take exception to the term, it is an error in
terminology that can quickly send you packing. Indeed, many well-intentioned
admirers have struck out simply because of a misguided attempt to be friendly.
Here is a good rule to follow; Don't refer to anyone as a shemale, transsexual,
transvestite, etc. until you have asked what she prefers to be called. A
politely worded inquiry should prompt a t-girl to let you know exactly what term
she considers most appropriate. If you must use a term, rather than a person's
name, perhaps the term transgendered is the least offensive of all the terms.
This is a generic term that fits most t-girls and is rarely offensive.
Avoid horrible
opening lines - I have frequently wondered, does anyone really get lucky
using lines like "hey, any chicks with dicks in this chatroom?" or,
"I sure could use a shemale to suck my dick." Ask yourself, is my
intention to offend people, or do I really want to meet people that will enrich
my life? If you chose the latter, you will probably want to avoid the horrible
opening lines. Instead, try showing an interest in t-girls that you see online
in the personal ads, in chat rooms, on message boards or even in person. Begin
by introducing yourself briefly and asking permission to chat, e-mail or
whatever. Try exchanging information, making small talk and getting to know
the t-girls. By investing a little time to get to know us, you will be able to
sort through those of us who you genuinely have an interest in.
Search the
personal ads -
Personal
ads are one of the best ways to meet quality people. Unlike people who are
chatting in the chat rooms, or who post messages on bulletin boards, the people
who place personals are interested in meeting others. In fact, they are so
interested that they have taken the time to place a personal ad. I recommend
that you first
search
the personal ads to see if you find someone interesting. If so, politely
respond to their ad to see if you can begin corresponding. If all goes well,
perhaps this will result in a personal meeting and romance! If you don't see
anyone that matches your criteria, try placing your own personal ad. A recent
photo in your ad is an absolute must. When used properly, personal ads are
one of the most effective and least expensive methods for meeting quality
people. I frequently hear back from people who have met someone special in the
personals and I'd love to hear your success story!
Visit the
nightclubs - You may wish to find
a local transgender nightclub where you can meet t-girls in person. This offers the
advantage that you will immediately know if there is an attraction. There is
also the possibility of an immediate gratification if you hit it off. There is
also a disadvantage that you must be aware of. While many of the t-girls go to
transgender friendly nightclubs to socialize in a safe environment, there are
others who are there to sell their wares. Some of the t-girls you will meet at
nightclubs are professionals and you will pay a price for their
affection. For those of you who want to check out the transgender friendly
nightclubs, there is an online listing at http://www.ts4play.com/transsexual-nightclubs.htm
- This can be an effective way to meet t-girls, but please let common sense
guide you and be careful!
Use online
resources - There are a number of online resources that will help you
understand and meet t-girls. Among these are chat rooms, message boards,
personal ads and directory searches. Each has their own advantages and
disadvantages. It is unlikely that you will make a romantic connection in the
chat rooms and message boards, but who knows? I still recommend that you
familiarize yourself with each of these resources. You will learn about t-girls
in the process. You'll be amazed at what you can learn if you sit back and
read the posts along with replies. For example, watch the t-girls go ballistic
when a guy enters a chat room and says, "hey, anybody want to suck my 9
inches."
Make a
great first impression - Whether in
person or in writing, making a good first impression is critical for success.
Most of us understand the importance of being clean and presenting ourselves in
a positive manner in person to person meetings. What many of us fail to realize
is that first impressions are equally important in written communications. When
you are e-mailing, chatting online or exchanging Instant Messages, you must rely
on mere words to make a good first impression. You will want to carefully choose
your words so you don't come off as offensive. Good grammar and spelling is
important, so don't get sloppy just because you're communicating electronically.
It is also important that you don't give the impression that you're impatient,
insincere or desperate. Practice being a good communicator, which means
expressing yourself well and being a good listener. Using good
communication skills, you will be able to learn about the t-girls you meet and
sort through them to find those that interest you the most.
Promote yourself!
- Here is a beauty of a tip that will pay off big if used properly. If you
are sincere in your desire to meet a t-girl, take a little time and make
yourself a website. It doesn't have to be elaborate, but it should include some
basic information about you. A photo is a must. A recent photo please, 'cause
you probably aren't going to impress anyone if you publish a 15 year old photo
of you and then they meet the present you. Describe yourself honestly and state
exactly what you're looking for. Tell a little about your interests, dislikes
and anything that makes you interesting or different from all the other guys
they may hear from. You don't have to be a professional website designer. There
are many programs available online that guide you through the process of setting
up a website easily and painlessly. The idea here is that you can provide a link to your
personal website to anyone you meet online, whether you are chatting in a chat
room, responding to a personal ad or responding to a message board post. This is
a great way to attract people who are truly interested in you!
Steer clear of
the bad apples - Just like other people in the real world, some t-girls have
drug or alcohol problems, nasty dispositions, etc.. A few simple questions will
reveal many of these undesirable traits. Be honest and forthright in your
communications and expect the same from others. I say it is definitely worth
spending a little time getting to know someone, rather than rushing into a
meeting that could be unpleasant, or even disastrous. Most t-girls are good
people, but there are those who should be avoided.
Play it safe! -
You must screen your t-girl friends just as you would screen any other potential
friends or lovers. Do they possess undesirable traits such as drug addiction,
alcohol abuse, criminal intent, HIV+, etc? Remember that you must protect
yourself. I don't want to preach here, but safety is a very important
consideration that cannot be overlooked just because you have a raging hardon!
The subject of safe sex also cannot be overemphasized. While TGTalk.com
strongly defends a persons right to sexual freedom, we also believe in a
responsibility of all people to engage in safe sex. This means getting to know
someone before you hop in the sack, using condoms and periodic testing for
sexually transmitted diseases. Have fun, but play it safe!
Patience and
perseverance are good qualities - Be prepared to sort through a number of t-girls
before you meet the person who is just right for you. My mama told me "you
better shop around." This is pretty sound advice, don't you think? By
trying to rush into something, many good men are turned away by the t-girls I've
seen online. Have a little patience and don't give up. Keep trying and refining
your approach. If you follow these tips, I assure you there is someone out
there who can't wait to find you!
Search the
transgender dating profiles in your area
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